The First Step if you are thinking about getting a divorce – Making the decision
The decision to end a marriage and start divorce proceedings can take days or years depending on the circumstances. For some the decision is made on the discovery that their partner is cheating on them or they meet someone else. For others it might simply be years of living in a loveless relationship and realising that there is an alternative. For many it is the fear of the unknown that is the stumbling block to making that final decision.
In my experience unless it is forced on them, no one goes ahead with a divorce when they are not sure. I see clients at all stages of this decision making process. Some clients instruct me straight away, others come back weeks or months later and for some it can take years. Some have even asked me if they should divorce their other half. Even though invariably in the circumstances they describe, my answer would be “yes”, it is of course not for me to make that decision. For everyone however, there is a point at which they know they are ready for what lies ahead.
So what is a divorce lawyer’s role in the decision making process, and why, in my opinion, if you are unsure, should you still seek advice at an early stage? The answer is simple – to give you the information you need to help you make the decision.
So what information would that be? Well, firstly if you are really not sure whether the relationship or marriage can be saved then I would recommend some form of marriage guidance or coaching. Not for everyone I know but for some it simply helps them focus on the issues in the relationship and how they can overcome those issues.
If however it is clear that the marriage is at an end and you are just frightened of the process then my role as a family and divorce lawyer really kicks in. For me the most important thing I can do for you is give you all the information you need about the process, the different options open to you, the likely costs of each option and the likely outcome. My intention is that you go away from our meeting not feeling frightened any more, enabling you to make that life-changing decision.
In my next blog I will talk about how to find a good family solicitor.
If you need advice on any issue surrounding your divorce or breakdown of your relationship call me, Karen Weiner, on 01923 521003 or email me at firstname.lastname@example.org